Assalamualaikum w.b.t
Artikel Nurses and School-Teachers Only, Please? banyak menganggu minda saya, bukan apa, penat memikirkan masalah demi masalah yang berlaku di kalangan kaum Hawa.
Jika artikel saya yang bertajuk Bertudung tetapi berzina mendapat respons yang menggalakkan daripada pembaca sekalian, sekaligus membuktikan bahawa fenomena kaum hawa yang menggunakan tudung sebagai apparatus untuk bergaya dan berfesyen, ada kebenarannya.
Walaubagaimanapun artikel Nurses..(terlalu panjang untuk disambung) membuktikan sekali lagi tanggapan saya selama ini bahawa golongan-golongan remaja wanita yang sedang belajar untuk menjadi golongan professional, ataupun jika dikecilkan skop pemikiran-menjadi doktor.
Walaupun mempunyai seorang kakak bergelar doktor dan berusia 30 tahun dan masih lagi tidak bersuami, dengan alasan mahu melaksanakan cita-citanya menjadi pakar bius, saya masih kurang paham mengapa kaum wanita yang bakal bergelar professional ini, memilih untuk mencari calon suami.
Jika di IPTA/IPTS kita risau mengenai gejala kaum Hawa yang bunting tanpa suami (mungkin kerana pilihan terlampau banyak), di kalangan golongan kaum Hawa yang akan menjadi doktor pula kita amat merisaukan mereka kerana dikatakan tidak “laku†lantaran kesibukan yang bakal mereka alami tatkala bergelar isteri dan juga suami.
Saya mula didedahkan dengan hakikat ini apabila diceritakan mengenai kisah-kisah doktor-doktor wanita yang hanya merawat anak kecil mereka di rumah lantaran tidak mahu anak terbiar ataupun membesar sendirian.
Jika mahu diluaskan skopnya, hal ini sebenarnya bukan berlaku dikalangan doktor sahaja, malahan professional wanita lain seperti jurutera,peguam mahupun arkitek. Hal ini akan lebih parah jika wanita itu mendapat pendidikan di luar negara. Expectation terhadap bakal suami mereka amatlah tinggi.
Kacak? Penyayang? Berpendidikan tinggi? Berduit? mungkin itu hanya sebahagian daripada ciri2 yang saya rasa harus ada pada setiap suami idaman mereka.
Realiti tidak seindah ideal, dan nobody is perfect. Saya berpendapat mencari seseorang yang dapat memahami anda sudah cukup. Apa guna mempunyai seorang suami lulusan undang-undang daripada Harvard School of Law, ( un peu exaggere) jika dia tidak dapat memahami kerjaya anda, passion dan kehendak anda?
Walaubagaimanapun, saya tidak dapat menyalahkan mereka untuk memilih calon suami idaman mereka, kerana bukan sahaja mereka mahu yang terbaik (yang sudah tentu hak mereka), malahan mereka juga terpaksa menerima tekanan daripada ibu-bapa mereka yang mahukan yang terbaik untuk mereka. Apalagi jika mereka melihat anak sebelah rumah mengadakan majlis kenduri perkahwinan di hotel terkemuka di ibu kota, sudah tentu mereka mahukan anak gadis mereka juga mendapat yang terbaik.
Jika anda di Malaysia mungkin anda berpendapat hal ini tidak ada solution, kerana kebanyakan suami tidak suka isteri mereka bekerja, mungkin, mereka merasakan “dayus†tambahan pula apabila gaji ataupun pangkat si isteri melebihi si suami. Ataupun stigma dalam Malay society bahawa “perempuan belajar setinggi manapun, tempatnya nanti tetap di dapur†sangat menebal di kalangan orang Melayu.
Jika kerajaan merasakan bahawa nisbah lelaki/perempuan di IPTA amat membimbangkan, saya merasakan kerisauan itu tidak ada kaitan dengan tanggapan bahawa lelaki akan menjadi suri rumah nanti dan perempuan akan bekerja. Kerana apa? Kerana jika anda berjaya memasuki universiti, belum tentu anda akan bekerja, malahan pula kebanyakan kursus yang diceburi oleh golongan wanita bukanlah kursus yang menjamin pekerjaan dalam konteks Malaysia sebagai negara membangun.
Malaysia memerlukan tenaga mahir,dalam pelbagai industri, oleh yang sedemikian tidak hairan jika kaum lelaki yang memang diakui suka berfoya-foya dan mungkin merempit ini lebih cenderung memasuki pusat-pusat latihan kemahiran seperti IKM,IKBN mahupun Pusat Giat Mara.
Saya amat bersetuju jika ada yang mengatakan bahawa di Malaysia mungkin remaja lelaki lebih suka bermain-main dan tidak serius dalam pelajaran mahupun hidup mereka. Hal ini dikukuhkan lagi dengan jumlah penagih lelaki, perogol dan perompak dan penyamun serta pencabul yang semakin meningkat.
Jika difikirkan, adakah dengan sebab itu kaum Hawa harus memilih betul-betul calun suami mereka. Jika difikirkan sekali lagi ianya seolah-olah begitu anomali ataupun paradoks dengan Pendidikan Islam yang saya pelajari ketika Form 5 dulu, dimana si lelaki yang mencari isteri,dengan ciri2 yang telah ditetapkan oleh Islam.
Jika di barat, hal ini tidak menjadi masalah kerana kebanyakan pasangan suami –isteri bekerja dan saling membantu antara sama lain. Tidak timbul soal dayus mahupun bacul jika lelaki yang menukar lampin anak mahupun memasak jika isteri bekerja. Malahan mereka kalau boleh ingin meringankan bebab pasangan masing-masing dengan menolong sejauh mana yang boleh.
Ataupun adakah lelaki melayu berpendapat maruah mereka lebih penting dan perempuan itu diciptakan sebagai mesin seks ataupun orang gaji mereka?
7 responses so far ↓
eq // Nov 3, 2007 at 8:19 am
“Kerana jika anda berjaya memasuki universiti, belum tentu anda akan bekerja, malahan pula kebanyakan kursus yang diceburi oleh golongan wanita bukanlah kursus yang menjamin pekerjaan dalam konteks Malaysia sebagai negara membangun.”
I like this because it is totally true. Many women are not being practical when choosing a major. Not many institutions in Malaysia expose the career life in any particular major. It is so sad to see that clever women studying sciences end up not getting a job while average women who are studying communication or management getting a good and practical job. What a waste of education among Malaysian students.
mypetridish // Nov 5, 2007 at 6:36 am
what do you mean they are not being practical when choosing a major? as long as they like their major, are capable of scoring A’s, and are diligent with their work, I see nothing impractical about that.
unless you have a different idea of how impractical women doctors could be. of which you could help yourself by being more specific.
do you have any statistics about these “women scientist who arent able to get a job?” this is the first that i have heard of this. if you dont, i think its time that you stop throwing around meaningless points of discussions that came from their behind.
there are about female 25 scholars in my college majoring in biotech. I can testify that they are just as good, if not better than the rest of the guys here. they are more hardworking albeit a little behind when it comes to conceptualizing. of which i would come in handy - for their notes in return, as my notes are crappy.
eq // Nov 5, 2007 at 11:49 pm
Majoring in medicine is being very practical. After you graduate, the job is waiting for you (especially in Malaysia). No one taking medicine is jobless unless they quit in the middle.
You were asking ” do you have any statistics about these “women scientist who are not able to get a job?†this is the first that i have heard of this”. Are you referring to the world’s women scientist or Malaysia? Because I am referring to Malaysia. Check this out for the statistic http://www.malaysia-today.net/blog/2006/03/hampir-400000-wanita-di-malaysia-masih.htm
But if you believe in Malaysian government you might want to refer to this http://www.pemudaumno.org.my/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=4138
because it supports your argument.
Succeed and score in school is not a big deal because in the end what counts is whether you get a job or not.
As Malaysian as well, I am concerned about the situation. It is not like I am trying to condemn the Malaysian women. I have sisters, cousins and girlfriends that are pursuing all these complicated science majors in Malaysia and overseas.
They came from great schools (Asrama Penuh or MRSM), score a lot of As in SPM. The Chinese and Indians did not go to these school. They only went to normal school and then IPTS. But they can get good jobs.
I am just worried that our local government are into producing great successful graduates instead of productive and valuable graduates who can get a job.
I am not just worried about these women I am also worried about myself and my country
Relax la brother
This is very interesting topic. Maybe we can do something about it.
mrq // Nov 6, 2007 at 6:08 am
hehe, agree with mypetridish, statement without any concrete fact aint worth arguing.
mypetridish // Nov 11, 2007 at 9:25 pm
To be honest I find it hard to comprehend what you wrote. If you have the chance please rephrases your post.
Hehe, if you havent noticed, the biggest reason most of the Malay graduates couldn’t get a job is due to the lack of English competency. Instead spending time in front of your computer, leave the house and get to know your peers. Talk to the employers, ask them if them Malay graduates are able to compose a constructive sentence.
To your credit I’d say you’ll be able to pass an interview. Not so much if they require you to write essays describing yourself.
It is known that the government has been short-sighted when it comes to managing its human capital. Who needs to hire IT graduates when India is coming up with cheaper and more capable graduates?
Also not to mention that Malaysian mega projects always end up as vaporware. What has that damned MSC done for us? I haven’t heard of any foreign journals describing its success and how it is beneficial to local companies aside from giving out badges to MSC status companies that does nothing more than screaming “Hey hey, I have MSC status. I’m so IT” (pun not very much intended)
You’re contradicting yourself. You mentioned:
“(To) Succeed and score in school is not a big deal because in the end what counts is whether you get a job or not.”
This could use a rephrasing. Whatever it means, I think you meant doing well in your college isnt as important as getting a job. Oh, but here’s some news for you. It’s the grades, stupid. Which company would hire a 2.0 CGPA student over a 3.9er? Of course, grades arent everything, but I’m willing to bet that the 3.9er knows better about his work in lab compared to his/her lame counterpart.
Boarding schools and MRSMs are overrated. A lot of people who didn’t go to one still manage to do well in their SPM. Case in point: Amalina who scored 17As for her SPM. So what if them Chinese and Indians didn’t go to those schools? In the end it comes down to each individual. I also find that some Malays are too dependent on others that they couldn’t help themselves, no offence.
Look at you, your tone suggests a notion that those who went to boarding schools and IPTA would get good jobs. Yet the members of your race make up the most of the pupils in these institutions AND these are the same people who are unemployed.
How can you refer those who couldnt get jobs as “successful graduates”? I’d take workers who know how to do their job anytime over those who have a degree but know nothing about the job at hand - which is what Malaysia is producing
Yeah, relax la brother. Just stay put while globalization is knocking on our doorsteps. While others are working hard in producing the best of minds to compete globally, we are still talking about the correlation between the jobs that you have with the types of guys/girls that you would score.
lol
nks // Dec 21, 2007 at 5:41 am
“While others are working hard in producing the best of minds to compete globally, we are still talking about the correlation between the jobs that you have with the types of guys/girls that you would score….”
…there you go.
(that’s about everything i wanted to say in my comment. nicely debated though
adibahabdullah // Feb 3, 2008 at 10:53 pm
salam,
nks and mypetridish, with all due respect though, i think that comment should be reserved for ‘certain sites’ where people seem to ravish in arguments about whether there are still good men/women out there to marry, how to ditch their couples, what is the (romanticized) requirements for the perfect muslimah, etc etc, in the least intellectual manner possible. here, at least, people are trying to be critical.
meow~
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